Defence Attorney: Did you have ECT?
Defence Attorney: How do you know you had ECT?
Plaintiff: This “Statement of Benefits Paid” shows a psychiatrist and an anesthesiologist billed the health care system for such a procedure every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for these five consecutive weeks.
Defence Attorney: Do you have any other evidence than just this piece of paper?
Defence Attorney: Do you actually remember having ECT?
Defence Attorney: Do you have any recollection whatsoever of having ECT?
Defence Attorney: So how can you claim something happened when you have no memory whatsoever of it happening?
Plaintiff: The ECT erased my memory.
Defence Attorney: Your Honour, we have already heard expert testimony that ECT causes no memory loss. Furthermore, the psychiatric diagnosis of the plaintiff demonstrates that he is delusional, which proves the claim that he had ECT is just a delusion. My clients simply accidentally filled in the wrong numbers when filling out their time sheets. They have already submitted corrections and have returned the additional funds they received due to their error, which they regret deeply.
Judge: This is pretty clear. I can’t let this case continue. Case dismissed… However, I am concerned about the health of the plaintiff and his delusions. What will happen to him?
Defence Attorney: My clients are also concerned about him and have offered to treat him pro bono.
Judge: This is very commendable. You doctors are a credit to your profession. Do you think you can really help him?
A Defendant: Yes, Your Honour. We plan to give him ECT until he’s not a problem whatsoever